Epic Beard Bot Makes You Want Amber Lamps!


Epic Beard Bot Makes You Want Amber Lamps!

Epic Beard Bot, a large and slightly crazy 67-year old Vietnam veteran put on his favorite “I AM A MOTHERFUCKER” shirt the other day to go for a simple bus ride through Oakland and became famous!

While riding said bus he got into a slight altercation, and by slight I mean he bashed someone’s face in until the bashee started leaking and asking for amber lamps. Just another day on public transit.

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Golf is No Challenge for Rovechkin!


Golf is No Challenge for Rovechkin!

Oh what a sad day! Rovechkin’s team, the Washington Capitals, was knocked out of the playoffs by Crosbot’s team. Don’t worry Rovechkin, you’ll get them next year. In the meantime Rovechkin may well go golfing since he has some newly found free time.

The first time that The Russian Machine ever tried his clanker at golf he hit a hole-in-one! How’s that for a naturally awesome athlete? And who knew robots played golf?

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Lump It!


Lump It!

When Rovechkin scored his 50th goal this season, leading all NHL players, he did a little celebration on the ice because his stick was so damn hot! Canadian hockey players are famously conservative (mostly) and dislike too much emotion during the game.

Crosbot is famously an crotchety old man trapped inside a young man’s body and had this to say about the way Rovechkin goes about his business “I don’t like it personally, but uh, that’s him. Like it or lump it, that’s what he does…

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Rovechkin’s Hat-Trick Makes Crosbot Sad!ockey


Rovechkin's Hat-Trick Makes Crosbot Sad!ockey

Game #2 of the dream NHL Playoff series between rival teams Washington Capitals and Pittsburgh Penguins was an epic clash of who have been billed the two best hockey players in the world, Rovechkin (Alexander Ovechkin, YEAAA) and Crosbot (Sidney Crosby, BOOO)!

Rovechkin and Crosbot both had a hat-trick, but Rovechkin’s was first, prettier and won the game! It’s a hockey tradition for the fans to throw their hats on the ice to honor the accomplishmentThis didn’t sit well with Crosbot who asked the referees to make an announcement to stop throwing so many hats!

In honor of the accomplishment I have a hat-trick of Rovechkins on the way!

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Robobby Badclankers is Ridiculous


Robobby Badclankers is Ridiculous

Somewhere close to the end of the Internets I came across Bobby Badfingers “The World’s Fastest Finger Snapper.”

He’s been working the crazy finger snapping for something like 20 years and besides being totally ridiculous, he’s pretty damn entertaining!

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BushBot Doesn’t Want Your Shoes


BushBot Doesn't Want Your Shoes

I’m posting this a little late, but it’s too classic. A journalist tried to give BushBot the shoes off his feet during his last visit to Iraq. For some reason he decided not to accept them.

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Blagobot Had Big Plans


Blagobot Had Big Plans

Blagobot had it all figured out. As governor of Robama’s home state, he has the power to hand out seats. Why do it for free? A Senate seat is a fucking valuable thing!

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ROFLBot Fears Robot Frank + Dark Alleys


ROFLBot Fears Robot Frank + Dark Alleys

My favorite robot from the internets has to be Robot Frank. He’s an evil robot who causes mayhem as if it was his day job. That’s the life.

Though hilarious for an observer, this makes Robot Frank a frightening robot to run across in a dark alley, or pretty much anywhere, as ROFLBot found out firsthand.

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eBot’s Ass on Display


eBot's Ass on Display

This is what eBot will do for a little change. Drop his rear panel, zip down and prepare to lube up.

Maybe if someone had bid on his auction he wouldn’t feel forced to go to such extreme lengths.

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SuckaBot Just Gave All His Money to a Nigerian Doctor!


SuckaBot Just Gave All His Money to a Nigerian Doctor!

SuckaBot just received an unbelievable business opportunity via the Spam folder in his Gmail account!

A very nice nigerian doctor just needs him to hand over his bank account information and he’s sure to be given millions of dollars for free!

No need to worry little guy!

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